Dervish Gets Onto Santa's Extremely Naughty List

Santa Claus flew over to Dervish's gay brothel in Paris on Christmas 2024 and took a dump in his chimney. Dervish, who had fallen asleep near his fireplace, had been waiting up for hours in hopes of seeing Santa arrive to his brothel to receive Christmas presents from him. Little did he know what Santa had waiting in store for him.

Santa had already gone to all the other nations on the other side of the international date line, delivering Christmas presents. He started in the northern hemisphere, starting in Greenland, Iceland, Finland, Norway and Sweden. The Norwegian and Swedish single ladies were extremely nice and sweet to Santa, giving him plenty of treats and kisses sweeter than Hersheys.  

Santa continued his journey and stopped over in Denmark, where the single ladies had baked plenty of strawberry Danishes for him to take along his journey and consume in remote desert areas where the population remained far and few between. In Holland, the Dutch single ladies gave Santa hot cocoa and other Dutch treats to go.  

Santa continued his journey, stopping by Vladimir Putin's home. Putin and his family graciously hosted Santa, showing holiday cheer as they celebrated and gave Santa a shot of aged vodka to help warm him up in frigid regions.  

Santa continued heading through Asia and Africa. In Kenya, the Obama families treated Santa with honor and respect, unlike their black sheep family relatives in the United States. The relatives of Obama in Kenya confirmed what Santa had heard from intelligence in DC. As Santa flew over the Middle East, Santa Claus took his first dumps over the ISIS & HAMAS hideouts, setting fire to them as his dumps hardened hard as coal and got flaming hot while falling from the sky.  

Santa Claus stopped over in Jerusalem, paying a visit to Benjamin and Sarah Netanyahu. They celebrated Hanukah together, praising God for the blessings they were given. Bibi asked Santa to deliver a special blessing to the Trump families when Santa arrived in the United States.  

Santa Claus headed South to New Zealand, then Australia, enjoying the Kiwi fruits from the single ladies of New Zealand as he relaxed in the sun. As he headed to Australia, he stopped at his buddy's place, where his buddy known as Agent Mulder and his lady Agent Scully took him to a train station to ride on the Doodlebugs for a few hours of downtime fun and relaxation. Santa had a fill of Vegemite sandwiches as he relaxed in Australia, listening to some old school Little River Band songs, then some rocking guitar licks from Agent Mulder's guitars. He then headed to Sky News Australia's studio to do a live stream with his favorite hosts and hostesses Paul Murray, Rowan Dean, James Morrow, Gabriella Powers, Liz Storer, Danica Digiorgio and Rita Panahi.

Santa then headed to Antarctica to stop at a secret Santa portal to load up more gifts for his journey back to the North Pole. The midnight sun warmed him up as he consumed the kiwi fruit from his stopover, to energize him for the journey through the Amazon jungles. Santa got his samplings of Argentine and Brazilian barbecue, took a few rides in vintage Brazilian Ford trucks from the 50s to 70s style trucks, and got his fill of empanadas to go as he headed north. As he arrived in Guatemala, he planned his passage route from Mexico to the island nations in the Caribbean before heading into the USA. After stopping in the Caribbean nations, he took another dump over Raul Castro's home in Cuba, once again dropping hard flaming coals from the sky. The flames looked like meteor showers as they dropped down. A mini hurricane formed in time to drop the coals down Castro's chimney, stinking up the house, but lighting the burnt logs in the fireplace back on fire.

Santa then flew over the Gulf of Mexico and followed the path of the Rio Grande to the Pacific Coast, where he headed to Hawaii, then the Aleutian Islands. He then stopped over in Alaska before heading over to Canada. A number of Canadian residents who were vintage car and truck fans came to Santa in their vintage Fargo and Mercury pickup trucks and their Meteor Rancheros to entertain him before he had to head to Juicy Turd-0's palace in Quebec. The Hawaiian coconut milk and macadamia cookies, after digestion, had given Santa plenty of fiber for him to take several bigly dumps, starting at The Trudeau Crime Syndicate compound in Montreal Quebec Canada. He then skipped over to Washington DC, tempted to drop a load over the Capitol. However, he decided it would not be cleaned up in time for President Trump to take office again, so he headed to Delaware and dropped his load into Joe Biden's chimney. He then headed first to Sacramento California, giving Gavin Newsom his fair share of coal to stink up the state capitol even further. He then headed to Nancy Pelosi's Frisco mansion, where he unloaded a huge diarrhea dump down the chimney. His next 2 stops were in Oakland California, at Doogie Empoxx VD's house, then Governor Baldy Moonbeam's "Frugal Shack" powered by Communist Chinese Solar Panels. Moonbeam's outhouse inside the shack overflowed into his thief den and fireplace, where Nick took another dump. Nick headed back east, with a stop in Minnesota at Tampon Timi's mansion, leaving a load for weirdo Tampon Timi and Gwen Walz to gorge on. Timi and Gwen had a feast that morning, washing it down with Timi's horse juice.  

Nick headed over to Mar-A-Lago to spend quality time with the Trump family, delivering Bibi's blessing, then strategizing for Nick's safe journey back to the North Pole. Nick had on we the most special booby prize coal to. As he unloaded his last load down Dervish's chimney at Dervish's gay brothel in Paris Tennessee, he could hear Dylan Dervish Mulvaney Sanders' flea ridden mutts howling with glee, waking Dervnac up from a drunken stupor orgy. Derpwood's drunken stupor got him to post his queer fixations on line, with baseless inflammatory accusations, causing him to embarrass himself on line.